As an ADHDer and ADHD coach, I start my day with a pause. Building pauses into my daily routine has been a game changer.
My win is a calmer, less anxious work life and a happier home life.
Why are small pauses so important?
Having an ADHD impulsive brain that pays attention to everything means it’s often on high alert for the unwelcome stresses of being human. This can put a strain on your mental health and wellbeing.
It’s not only neurodivergent people who become overwhelmed and react emotionally or impulsively to worrying information or challenging situations. However, in my experience, ADHDers have enormous emotions. We can feel as if things are supersized. And if you’re a woman, you have the added gift of your hormones fluctuating throughout your lifetime.
It can feel impossible to slow down our ADHD impulsive, emotional reactions, which leads to us judging ourselves more. Yup, it’s vicious this cycle of shame and blame.
The good news is you can recognise what’s going on and give yourself the space to decide how to respond. Creating a pause is like building a muscle; the more you do it the easier it becomes.
Ready to create your pause?
Book your free 20-min discovery call
We’ll explore how creating a pause and working with your unique ADHD brain helps you achieve your goals.
How to create a pause
There are many ways to create a pause. Discovering what works best for you makes it easier to build into your life. Here’s a well-trodden technique which has worked well for me.
Recognising how your body responds when you sense ‘danger’
Our brains developed thousands of years ago to sense danger. These days, we don’t have to watch for lions as we sleep, but our brains still behave like we do. Our brains are trying to protect us which sends us into danger mode.
Things happen quickly in our brains and our bodies respond in kind. Getting to know how we feel when a big emotion kicks in is the first step. This helps us to know if the danger is real. Creating a pause lets you look at the evidence and check if it matches up with your feelings.
Try this
Think back to a time when you’ve had a big emotional response to something. Ask yourself where you felt it in the body: Did your face tense? Did you feel a knot in your tummy? Did you become hot or sweaty?
If it’s difficult to remember how you felt in the moment, try noticing next time you have a big emotion.
Changing your focus with micro-meditations
When you experience ‘danger’ sensations, you can become overpowered by them and spiral into negative thoughts. Changing your focus, even briefly, can create a pause.
A micro-mediation is a moment of focus for as little as 15 seconds. It can be focusing on rubbing two fingers together. It can be feeling each of your toes individually. Or, it can involve noticing sounds very near and very far away.
Practising short bursts of focus regularly helps to build up the pause muscle. This ensures that helpful techniques are there when we need them.